O.K. Ladies, here are the notes from today, what an amazing God we have, so much good stuff in this first chapter!!
A Woman's Journey
Sometimes it's hard to know when exactly you become a woman. Some days I know I feel like maybe I am one, some days I still feel much like that same little girl, pretending I'm a woman. When exactly is it that we earn the title of womanhood? Is it when we graduate high school, turn 18, when we get married, become a mother, start our period, get that first bra, first kiss? Many times through our life we may feel that after we accomplish this, get married, have children, get that degree, become a great cook, pastry chef, whatever, then we will feel we have attained womanhood. But, many times after we pass through these stages, we still feel much the same. We've received lots of different messages, but very little help in what it means to become a woman. There are many books that tell of the masculine journey, rites of passage, initiations and the like, many of them helpful. But, very little wisdom is offered on the path to becoming a woman!
We know what the Proverbs 31 woman looks like and many other expectations we woman have, either from the world, or the church. Not that the Proverbs 31 woman is a bad model, quite the contrary, but when too much emphasis is placed on doing, doing, and more doing, sometimes we don't see a strong, beautiful, confident woman, you see an exhausted woman! I think sometimes we can be overly committed to serving in our church, not that serving is bad, but being overly committed can be. When we are too busy serving that we don't take time to sit and soak in God's presence, then we are not strong woman of God, we're just tired!
Unseen, Unsought, and Uncertain
It's amazing to me and relieving to find out that I'm not the only woman with the deep nagging feeling that I'm not measuring up to the type of woman I was created to be. I feel often that I'm not enough, yet too much! I feel like I'm not pretty enough, not kind enough, not patient enough, not worthy, not disciplined enough. Yet, on the flip side, I struggle with feeling too emotional, too needy, too sensitive, too strong, too opinionated, too messy, too critical. The result of this is shame, and it haunts us. It can cut to our deepest fear, which is that we will end up being abandoned and alone. I know I struggle with this, which seems crazy to me! I have a faithful man, who I have never once felt would leave me, but yet, deep inside sometimes I struggle with feeling this way, or that something bad might happen to him, leaving me alone. Why is this?? If I don't take this to God, and let Him speak healing to my heart, it can mess up a lot of my relationships in this life.
As we struggle through our days sometimes we wonder why life seems so hard, it must be us right? We feel unseen, even by those who are closest to us. We feel unsought, that no one has the passion or the courage to pursue us, to get past our messiness to find the woman deep inside. And we feel uncertain, uncertain what it even means to be feminine, uncertain if we are or ever will be.
The Heart of a Woman
Proverbs 4:23 says, "Guard your heart with all diligence, for out of it spring the issues of life." Guard our heart above all else, why? Because God knows that our heart is core to who we are as woman. It is the source of all our creativity, our courage and our convictions. It is the driving source of our faith, our hope, and of course, our love. Genesis 1:27 says, "So God created man in His own image; in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them." Whatever it means to bear God's image, we do so as a woman. Female! Our feminine heart was created as a reflection of God's own heart! We can't change we are woman, and we are woman to our soul, that's how our Father created us. Listen to our hearts as woman, watch how little girls play and you'll find three longings in the heart of most every woman: to be romanced, to play an irreplaceable role in a great adventure, and to unveil beauty. This is when we come alive!
To Be Romanced
Think about games most little girls play, the movies we love to watch as woman. We love the feeling of being wanted and fought for! As we grow older we tend to be embarrassed of this though, but it's there none the less. I know I feel weak in myself when I feel that desire to be wanted, fought for, rescued. But, that desire is placed there for a reason; we shouldn't be ashamed of feeling this way! I was praying for the Holy Spirit to show me what this looks like in present day to day life. He showed me it's in the small ways. For instance when I've expressed the desire to move our furniture around, John as offered to help when he gets home, but in my excitement for how the room could look, I go ahead and do it myself. Then, when he gets home, he looks somewhat disappointed that he didn't get to help me. I realize now that this is his way of coming to my rescue. So, from now on I'm going to be that princess in need of my prince coming and moving my furniture around for me:)
To be romanced is certainly not the only thing a woman wants, or what we derive our existence as woman from, but we do want it!
An Irreplaceable Role in a Great Adventure
There is something powerful and fierce in the heart of a woman, just mess with our children, our man, or our friends, and you'll see it come out! I've felt that powerful feeling rise up within me sometimes when I've felt my family was threatened, and it has surprised me at times. I wonder where that powerful feeling, so strong and overtaking even came from! A woman is a warrior to, in a uniquely feminine way. Think of Mary and Ruth, Deborah and many other Bible woman, not only are they nice, sweet and gentle, but they were passionate and powerful woman who were beautiful as warriors! We are called to be passionate woman sharing in adventure with others!
Beauty to Unveil
Psalm 45:11 says, "So the King will greatly desire your beauty; because He is your Lord, worship Him." The desire to be delighted in is seen easily in little girls. It's why they play dress up, paint their nails, get their ears pierced, play wedding, ball, princess. It's why they play with our shoes, clothes, jewelry, make-up.
Who ever growing up had to have the skirt that twirled the most? I know I did, the better it twirled, the better the dress! There was a time when I only wanted to wear dresses.
Verbal or not, whether wearing a shimmery dress or covered in mud, all little girls want to know, as Bethany Dillan wrote in her song;
I want to be beautiful
And make you stand in awe
Look inside my heart
And be amazed
I want to hear you say
Who I am is quite enough
I just want to be worthy of love
And Beautiful
Think also of a time when you've been to a fancy event. How long before hand do you figure out what you will wear? We may buy something, borrow something, or pull something new together, but there is definitely planning and thought involved. Especially on your wedding day, you don't just pull any old thing from your closet and decide to wear that. There is a searching and dreaming of just the right gown that will make us look and feel as beautiful as possible! Think also of this fancy event, the men may also have dressed nice for it, but we all know it's all about the ladies:)! We all love to look at and compliment each others beauty!
The desire to be beautiful is also an ageless longing. From the time we're little girls twirling in our skirts, to when we're 80 rocking in our chair, we all want to be noticed, to feel beauty.
The desire to be beautiful has cost many of us countless pain. Broken hearts, tears shed, frustration over diet and other pains. I used to think that acne was just a teenage struggle, only to find it followed me into adult hood, what a disappointment!
It's not really even just the desire to look and feel beauty, but more a desire to be captivating in the depths of who we are! To be noticed not just for a beautiful outside, but to be noticed for a beautiful, pure, captivating person that we are inside! We want beauty that can be seen, felt, a beauty that affects others, and a beauty all our own to unveil.
The Heart of a Man
There are three core desires in most men's hearts. A battle to fight, just think of boys and their weapons, strangely it's how they show their affection. Most women want to be fought for.
Men long for an adventure, just think of boys and their climbing, jumping, hunting, anything that seems dangerous is an adventure. We want to be part of an adventure.
Men long for a beauty to rescue. He doesn't just want to fight in a battle, he wants someone to fight for. Think of the countless men who have pictures of their sweethearts somewhere visible when they are at war. Our men want to fight for us!
The desires of a mans heart and a women's were meant to fit perfectly together! How amazing would this look and feel if we found how to live this out in the perfect way it was created!
Friday, October 22, 2010
Friday, October 8, 2010
Ladies Bible Study
Wow! What an amazing first meeting we had this morning, God is so good!! I introduced the book Captivating by John and Stasi Eldredge, that we will be studying together. It is totally optional to buy the book. I know as mommies it is hard sometimes to find even a little quiet time with our Lord, so I don't want you to worry about a heavy study and homework. I will be discussing each chapter and using the study guide for group discussion, you are welcome to read a long with me if you want.
Here are the notes from today:
Captivating is a book about discovering the mystery of the woman's heart, a heart meant for good, and a source of joy. Many times in life though, our heart becomes a source of shame. We feel that we are not good enough, we feel like we're not enough, yet we're too much. I know I struggle with this, and it's encouraging to realize I'm not alone! Too often the heart of women has been missed, we've missed the richness of femininity that it was meant to bring, we've missed the way it speaks to us of the heart of God. In Genesis 1:27 it says "So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them." God put different characteristics of Himself in both male and female! God speaks through woman something different than He speaks through man. If we miss the heart of women, we miss what God wants to speak through us.
This isn't a book about all the things we're failing to do as a woman. We're usually hard enough on ourselves, we don't need a book to help us feel worse:). There are so many different types of woman, doctors, teachers, woman who jump from planes, mommies, motorcycle woman, ballet dancers, the list goes on and on. We are each beautiful exactly how God made us!!
This book also isn't about stereotyping women. There is an essence (something that exists), that God has given to us, deep in our hearts, that we all share as women, no matter what type of women we are. When I read that, it just made me feel so special, that God puts something special inside us woman!
This book IS about discovering your priceless feminine heart. As I was preparing for this study, I thought about how our culture many times wants to put us in a box, either we are tough a tom-boy type, or really girly and frilly. I feel like I'm somewhere in between and sometimes it's hard to figure out where you fall in. God has set in each of us a femininity that is powerful AND tender, fierce AND alluring. One of the ladies pointed out that a good example of this is childbirth. Those who have been through childbirth know how fierce and strong you have to be and also how powerful you feel as you push new life into this world!! At the same time, once that little one has come out and rests in our arms, there comes over us such an intense sense of nurturing, such a tenderness for this new little life. But, someone try to hurt this new little life and watch out, the fierce woman raises up again:)
Sometimes the woman heart has been misunderstood, mistreated, abused, sometimes by ourselves, sometimes by others, but our heart that God gave us as woman is still there, and He says we are captivating!!!
We can trust our Father God with our hearts, no matter what condition they are in. He is our security as the beautiful, feminine woman He created us to be, we are secure in Him!!
Such special and powerful words, just in the introduction!! Next meeting we will be discussing Chapter 1, The Heart of a Woman. I hope you can join us as we discover the heart God has placed in us, more of His essence in us!!
God bless you!!
Kara also did an amazing job teaching the children about God's animal the squirrel. I was impressed with her ability to do this, her preparation she put into is, as well as the respect she received from the others, they all seemed to have a wonderful time together! It was a blessing to us mommies to watch them!!
Here are the notes from today:
Captivating is a book about discovering the mystery of the woman's heart, a heart meant for good, and a source of joy. Many times in life though, our heart becomes a source of shame. We feel that we are not good enough, we feel like we're not enough, yet we're too much. I know I struggle with this, and it's encouraging to realize I'm not alone! Too often the heart of women has been missed, we've missed the richness of femininity that it was meant to bring, we've missed the way it speaks to us of the heart of God. In Genesis 1:27 it says "So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them." God put different characteristics of Himself in both male and female! God speaks through woman something different than He speaks through man. If we miss the heart of women, we miss what God wants to speak through us.
This isn't a book about all the things we're failing to do as a woman. We're usually hard enough on ourselves, we don't need a book to help us feel worse:). There are so many different types of woman, doctors, teachers, woman who jump from planes, mommies, motorcycle woman, ballet dancers, the list goes on and on. We are each beautiful exactly how God made us!!
This book also isn't about stereotyping women. There is an essence (something that exists), that God has given to us, deep in our hearts, that we all share as women, no matter what type of women we are. When I read that, it just made me feel so special, that God puts something special inside us woman!
This book IS about discovering your priceless feminine heart. As I was preparing for this study, I thought about how our culture many times wants to put us in a box, either we are tough a tom-boy type, or really girly and frilly. I feel like I'm somewhere in between and sometimes it's hard to figure out where you fall in. God has set in each of us a femininity that is powerful AND tender, fierce AND alluring. One of the ladies pointed out that a good example of this is childbirth. Those who have been through childbirth know how fierce and strong you have to be and also how powerful you feel as you push new life into this world!! At the same time, once that little one has come out and rests in our arms, there comes over us such an intense sense of nurturing, such a tenderness for this new little life. But, someone try to hurt this new little life and watch out, the fierce woman raises up again:)
Sometimes the woman heart has been misunderstood, mistreated, abused, sometimes by ourselves, sometimes by others, but our heart that God gave us as woman is still there, and He says we are captivating!!!
We can trust our Father God with our hearts, no matter what condition they are in. He is our security as the beautiful, feminine woman He created us to be, we are secure in Him!!
Such special and powerful words, just in the introduction!! Next meeting we will be discussing Chapter 1, The Heart of a Woman. I hope you can join us as we discover the heart God has placed in us, more of His essence in us!!
God bless you!!
Kara also did an amazing job teaching the children about God's animal the squirrel. I was impressed with her ability to do this, her preparation she put into is, as well as the respect she received from the others, they all seemed to have a wonderful time together! It was a blessing to us mommies to watch them!!
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